


Spellbound I Am, I Am

by PandaFlower



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Crack Treated Seriously, Is it a sacrifice when you've been flirting with the monster for ages now?, KakaZabu Week 2018, Kakashi doesn't play the damsel well, M/M, Playing on the Sacrifice to a Monster Trope, Zabuza enjoys having Kakashi at his mercy a little too much for Kakashi's sanity, Zabuza's a little bloodthirsty, but isn't he always?, slightly silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 16:41:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15100844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PandaFlower/pseuds/PandaFlower
Summary: Kakashi's nearest and dearest get alittlefed up of him pining after the local forest troll. Zabuza's hardly complaining.





	Spellbound I Am, I Am

“So,” Zabuza mused, letting his gaze linger on the curve of the hunter’s body, straining to hold itself up, perhaps a little longer than was polite, “a little stuck, Hunter?”

“Shove it up your ass, Zabuza,” Kakashi snarled breathlessly, abdomen clenched and near shaking as he tries to fight gravity and get his feet and hands back under him. Far too pithy for a man dangling from a _failed_ attempt to escape a dinky rope net in Zabuza’s opinion.

The pissy glare he got when he told Kakashi so was simply glorious. Honestly, Zabuza may be reveling in this instance more than a little. It wasn’t often he caught the frustratingly coy hunter in such a ridiculous situation, Zabuza would be an idiot of the highest magnitude if he didn’t take the opportunity to tease him a bit. And idiots simply didn’t get to keep legendary swords.

Ignoring the glare, Zabuza circled the hunter, taking him in.

By the looks of it the hunter had gotten caught in a net trap, nothing too special, and then, not being very high up, had simply opted to slash the bottom of the net rather than the side. Only, his feet had gotten caught in one half, his hands in the other, and the natural physics of rope had seen him splayed out like a fresh kill, ready for the gutting. As Zabuza meandered around to face the hunter he revised his opinion; Kakashi was clinging to the net for _dear life_.

Zabuza once again judged the distance between Kakashi and the ground, breathing out a little ‘ah’ in understanding. The hunter was just low enough that if he let go he might bash himself silly on the ground.

“This is an unusual look on you, Hunter; planning to feed the birds?” Zabuza casually stuck Kubikiribocho in the ground and leaned on it, for all intents and purposes making himself comfortable right in front of Kakashi’s disbelieving face. “I thought the birds were supposed to feed you, isn’t that how hunting works? Unless I’ve missed my mark.”

“Zabuza.” Kakashi said tightly. “Now is not the time for you to pretend ignorance of basic things just because a human is doing them. It’s never funny.”

“It’s hilarious,” Zabuza corrected with a lazy, toothy smile. “I’ve met so many humans who practically cream their pants thinking they can ‘educate’ me. Watching them trip over the realization I’ve lured them into a trap is the highlight of my day, no lie.” And the more irritating they were about it the less likely they were to survive the trap.

Not that he’d fooled Kakashi for a second. The hunter was just too sharp by half, and one of these days Zabuza might just give in to the rather bloodthirsty urge to crack open his skull just to see if he actually kept obsidian shards up there rather than squishy grey matter. But for now, it was more fun to poke the man, and be poked back.

Obsidian shards wouldn’t be as soft as the hunter’s skin under Zabuza’s fingertips, nor as warm as his mirth.

“Are you going to stand there all day, or are you actually going to be _helpful_?” Kakashi demanded, no longer able to quite hide the wheeze in his voice. Zabuza couldn’t imagine that being a comfortable position to breathe in at all.

All the same, he still nudged him just to watch him spin and sway, taking in his cursing as Kakashi abruptly lost what little progress he had and splayed out further like it was music to his ears. Which it was, really. There was nothing quite like a fine voice edged with thwarted anger to set Zabuza at ease. Especially if he was doing the thwarting.

“I’ll take that as a no,” Kakashi muttered dryly when he swung back around.

“So what did you do, get caught in your own trap?” Zabuza smirked as he leaned back on his sword, crossing his arms in an unspoken promise not to set the hunter back to swinging. It didn’t seem terribly likely though, Kakashi liked to play dumb himself but he wasn’t _actually_ dumb enough to trip on his own trap. It didn’t even look like a proper hunter’s trap; the net was too low to keep enterprising bears— and Zabuza himself —from making off with the spoils, for one.

And for another, Kakashi knew better than to set traps in Zabuza’s area of the forest, his territory.

He’d maimed human’s for the insult before, thinking themselves skilled enough and clever enough to poach from him. As if a troll of his caliber wouldn’t notice the stench of their arrogance, the disturbance of their footsteps on the ground, the warning prickle on his skin when intruders poked the edges of his territory. It’s why he was even here, investigating to see who was foolish enough to enter without his express permission.

He hadn’t expected this though, not by a long shot.

Kakashi buried his face in his biceps, stubbornly silent even as the tips of his ears turned red. Now Zabuza was _really_ curious.

Zabuza nudged the netting again, a silent threat, “You say something? I couldn’t hear.”

Kakashi let his head droop through his arms with a sigh, “I said, I think my friends and family have gone insane.” Huh, friends and family? Ostensibly people Kakashi cared about enough to warn them away from poking the surly forest troll. Not that he took his own advice, forest forbid.

“Oh?” Zabuza felt a grin creeping up on him. “Now this I have to hear.”

Kakashi lifted his head enough to stare flatly at him, “Let me guess. You’re just going to keep being a prick until you do.”

Zabuza just smirked unrepentantly.

“Well,” he drawled, “I suppose that tree over there looks like a mighty fine place to nap.” And was conveniently in Kakashi’s line of sight, just to be an assole. “Got lots of nice, soft moss, not too much sun through the leaves. Man, I could sleep for—” Kakashi outright moaned in defeat, drooping in the ropes.

“Alright, alright!” he hurried to say. “Just— don’t leave me like this.”

Zabuza quirked a brow, as if to say _well? Get on with it. Some of us actually do have all day here and it isn’t you._

“They—” Kakashi managed through gritted teeth before sighing through his nose, determinedly not looking Zabuza in the eye. Which was _interesting._ “They’ve somehow taken it into their heads that we’ve been— that I’ve been flirting with you.” At Zabuza’s patiently neutral look his flush deepened. “And that I’ve been, perhaps, playing a bit _too_ hard to get. Which is completely ridiculous—”

“Huh,” Zabuza leaned back on his heels, eyeing the hunter speculatively.

“‘Huh?’” Kakashi parroted back. “What’s ‘huh?’ mean? Zabuza? _Zabuza._ ” Zabuza grabbed the net under Kakashi’s hands and the hunter fell silent, wary.

Ridiculous, huh? Zabuza was a little relieved that he wasn’t the only one getting fed up with the hunter mincing around his _feelings_ like Zabuza couldn’t _smell_ the want on him. Zabuza wasn’t interested in _coy_ ; he wanted the hunters sharp wit, his competitive spirit, and his willingness to meet a fight. All much more interesting traits in a human than fucking _shyness_.

“Huh means huh, Hunter. Ain’t that difficult to understand.” Zabuza meandered down the length of Kakashi’s body, letting his fingers skim the cotton his shirt down to his stomach, lingering there. Kakashi instinctively sucked his stomach in at the light touch, then slowly, cautiously, relaxing back on to the troll’s strong palm. “So they tied you up and left you here all pretty, huh?”

“Zabuza.” Kakashi’s tone was warning.

“Relax, Hunter, I’m hardly offended.” Rather the opposite really. And it wasn’t even his birthday. “What’s your opinion then?” As Kakashi was just above shoulder height it was all too easy to push up and take his weight onto his hand, take it off the ropes enough for the hunter to work his legs free now that he had some slack to work with. “Have I not chased you enough? Are you _uncertain_ of my stance on things? I’m not usually so opaque to you.”

“ _Um_ ,” the hunter fairly spluttered in embarrassment at the sudden line of questioning. “N-no, you’ve been very clear. Very, very clear.”

With his legs now free Kakashi curled them down, likely in preparation to slip off Zabuza hand, just as likely to ease his breathing. One hand left the net to brace on the troll’s shoulder and Zabuza let his hand tilt, letting gravity slide Kakashi down onto his shoulder with a sudden, breathless grunt of surprise.

“Well, if you understand what I want, and I understand what you want, then I’d say our circle of understanding is complete,” Zabuza said smugly, stepping swiftly away from the remains of the net before Kakashi could tighten his grip. “And I understand that it’s rude to turn down a gift.”

“Oh my god, _Zabuza_ —” Kakashi trailed off into a wordless noise of aggravation. And no small bit of arousal at being manhandled, Zabuza noticed gleefully. “Problem, Hunter?”

“I— no,” the hunter deflated, going limp in Zabuza’s grip. “Quite the opposite actually. It’s very disconcerting.”

“Is it?” Zabuza paused.

“Mm,” Kakashi hummed. “I don’t know that I can handle being with someone who thinks two people make a circle.”

“Of course they do!” Zabuza insisted, turning to home with his prize on his shoulders. “Sixty-nines count as circular don’t they?”

Kakashi made that nice noise again, “Shape-wise, maybe, not mathematically!”

“Math?” Zabuza echoed, “The hell would I need that for? I am but a simple forest troll.”

“Don’t give me that, it’s not funny! It’s never funny.” Kakashi growled him, actually growled.

“I’m hilarious,” Zabuza insisted. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 


End file.
